I always share this disclaimer at the beginning of my birth stories. It does seem unnecessarily obvious, but nevertheless. Worry not....it is not Dejavu nor have you woken up on Groundhog Day as a middle aged weatherman. I am indeed repeating myself and you if you have been here before....you have seen this tree. It is for those of you that have not seen this tree, that I include this before we begin our journey into the story that is Harvey's birth.
This is a birth story, folks. It is written for personal documentary purposes more than anything else but I also know how much I love reading a good birth story so I share for those of you that also care to read said stories. With description of such an event like birth...as glamorous as it is...often comes some detail that may or may not suit your reading (or viewing) fancy. There will not be any further TMI warnings. You are willingly boarding this boat and this is your TMI warning blanket statement. While I do try to keep it readable for general audiences, just know....this is a birth story... And you have now been adequately informed of such.
If you are ready for said details, mixed with some side banter, a dash of rant, and to know how I became the woman every other birthing woman hates, you may proceed.
Harvey was scheduled to be induced on March 26th, just two days shy of his due date. My midwife, ( Veronica Blair. Love her. 10/10 ) whom I only had the chance of being seen by for a few visits, (Hello, moving-states-in-the-third-trimester. 0 stars. Would not recommend) was wary of my history of post-partum hemorrhage. For those of you new here...I get a boggy - read:lazy - uterus after delivering such deliciously large babies. It doesn't clamp down well on it's own and causes me to bleed too much. It's not great. Because of this, she didn’t want me to go past 40 weeks, letting baby continue to get bigger and possibly exacerbate the issue (especially considering my last baby was 10lb 4oz at 39.5 weeks). Noor and I were not opposed. The hemorrhaging after the previous 2 deliveries was pretty traumatic and we really wanted a smooth go this time. I was already consistently measuring a week ahead by fundal height (not to be confused with fungal height. I’m sure you weren’t...but my autocorrect sure was and there is just not mushroom for misunderstandings here. Plenty of room for bad puns though, it seems.). Measuring a little ahead is pretty normal for me and my aforementioned deliciously large babies though, so we weren’t overly concerned about baby’s size. We figured he’d be in the “normal for me” range...somewhere around 9lb-10lb (HA! Spoiler alert. He was not.)
Also, because of my history of hemhorage, I had pretty much decided before I was even pregnant with Harvey, that I would be birthing with an epidural this time. Hemorrhaging post partum is quite unfortunate and the things that must be done to get it under control are even more unfortunate...all done in a place that just pushed a 9+lb baby and is already tender from such. The same place where a simple pat of a towel feels like literal sand paper. Internal manual sweeps for any possible retained tissue. Urinary catheters placed (sometimes more than once). The full body weight of multiple nurses on my recently emptied uterus. Shots in the thighs. Pills placed in unlikely places. D&Cs and blood transfusions. So unless you’re into that sort of thing.....It’s just all around not super great.
I used hypnobabies and labor tubs during my previous deliveries and loved my experiences. But the post delivery of 2/3 of those were just TERRIBLE. I couldn’t do it again. Enter: the blessed epidural....because if I was going to hemorrhage again, I was for sure going to be numb from the waist down when it did. Word. (Wow....do people even say that anymore? Whatever. It's my story. It stays.)
Our induction ended up being bumped to the following day...Saturday, March 27th...which is when this story begins.
On the morning of March 27, we woke up, called the hospital (Lone Peak in Draper, UT) to make sure there was still a room for us. We got dressed and ready to go. The girls woke up way too early so they were up and eating breakfast as we loaded the car to leave. The sun was barely up. 6:30am. My mom was there to stay with them while we were at the hospital. I grabbed a poppy seed Costco muffin to eat on the way...and ate 3 whole bites of it. Excited nerves.
We were led to our room to get settled in for our stay. I slipped into my luxurious delivery attire..a luxurious robe and ill-fitting bright yellow grippy socks and a little southern breeze. The room was great and spacious and really very nice.....but, in complete honest transparency, it was the Icee machine outside our door that really won our hearts. Unlimited. Icees. 24 hours a day. I'm pretty sure Noor was in actual heaven. We may have another baby just for a weekend with that machine next-door. (I joke. Mostly.)
Obligatory note about what it looked like to deliver a baby in a pandemic: I did have to be Covid tested, but once it came back negative I didn’t have to wear a mask through my entire stay. Noor had to wear a mask only when a staff member was in the room. The staff wore masks the whole time. Everything else felt pretty normal to us.
I was started on pitocin....a new experience for me as I had never been induced with pitocin before. I’d actually never had pitocin in my labors at all before...only post partum to help with the bleeding. I was a little apprehensive about things looking so differently than my previous deliveries, but that was also partially the idea so I was there for it. It left me not really sure of myself though when it came to knowing how far my body was or when I should opt for the epidural. We chatted with our nurse about my previous deliveries trying to gauge when I should get the it placed. After we told her how with my last labor I’d only felt a handful of contractions over the course of 2 hours and that once I hit 10cm, I stoped feeling the contractions at all, she then started saying “I don’t trust you to know when you’re too uncomfortable” every time I said I feel fine. We did not want to miss my window knowing that things progress quickly for me so we decided to get it placed then. I was still only mildly crampy and it felt early...but at the same time...I reallllllly did not want to miss that window. Also, once I had it placed, we could talk about breaking my water and really get the party started. My labors get real real fast once my water breaks
The epidural was placed. It was not an easy painless experience. The position they make you sit in is way uncomfortable when you’ve got a massive bowling ball on your front. I was basically breathing into a pillow, getting super hot and out of breath...because...you know...bowling ball in your diaphragm. The numbing shot was pretty rough and lasts longer than a 1 second pinch. I dare you to not flinch through that. By the time it was all done I could think was that my babies came out of me faster and easier than that....and while numb, the tingling is really quite an annoying feeling to get every time I move even the slightest amount. It feels like your entire bottom half has fallen asleep. That pins and needles feeling...but everywhere and it doesn’t leave.
BUT that epidural (for me) was for the hemorrhage part, should it happen. And I was so grateful and relieved once it was placed...knowing that even if it happened again, I could at least not have to feel it all full bore. That alone was worth it...
...So bless the anesthesia and the numbing shot and pins and needles and the catheter and the space age adhesive that held the catheter to my thigh that is surely used to hold together the rockets they send into space. Rivets and welds are old school. You need something to never come apart, never ever? Need something that can rip up your skin and the muscle layers underneath along with your soul and the core of the very earth on which you stand in one fail swoop? This is what you need. I guarantee it. It says right on the patch that it can be removed with alcohol. It lies. Unless it means you must drink copious amounts of hard liquor before attempting to remove it. That I can believe. But still...bless it....That and the complimentary back wax I got when they removed the epidural later. I would recommend skipping that part of the spa experience, but I guess it’s part of the package so it gets blessed too. Bless it all.
Once the epidural kicked in, my midwife broke my water....Cue the second great amniotic flood. (You can read about the first great flood in my previously self-published writings: Ellie’s Birth Story). You guys. So much water. My midwife and I both thought...well hey...maybe all this water is why you’d been measuring a week ahead. It just. kept. coming. And coming. And coming. I was about 4.5cm and 70% effaced at this point...it was around 12/12:30pm.
Not too long after that, I started feeling light headed and nauseated. We thought maybe I was in transition already, but upon checking my cervix again, it hadn’t changed much in the short amount of time since we’d broken my water. We had me lay with the peanut ball between my legs to help things keep progressing. (The peanut ball being an exercise type ball, but in the shape of a peanut. It fits between your knees when you lay on your side and helps your pelvis stay open so baby can proceed onward and outward more easily.)
I napped for an hour or so this way. I couldn’t feel the contractions except for in my left groin/upper thigh, just under my belly. It felt a lot like round ligament pain. Harvey was having some heart decels during contractions during this time so I would rotate from side to side every little while, which helped...annnnd when I say “I” what I definitely mean is my nurse and Noor would rotate me as I tried to lift my butt a full inch into the air. Labor and delivery, you guys...so glamorous.
So when you get to 10cm and ready to push, most women feel the “need to poop a watermelon." Not my phrasing. It’s literally what the nurses and providers all say. Again with the glamour....Too much, right? Well... I have never felt that. Even as my babies are literally on their way out of me. Even being unmedicated. I’ve never felt it. So not being able to feel the strength in my contractions for me to gauge my readiness to push, we checked my cervix again.
10cm. It was about 3pm or so and it was time to get this boy out. The room was then getting prepped for delivery. Everything I’d need if I hemorrhaged was waiting (which was both relieving and absolutely terrifying). My midwife was gowned up. Nurses at the ready. Baby warmer on and waiting.
I pushed with each contraction. I could feel them coming just enough to anticipate the next push. 3 pushes with each one. He’d have some heart rate decels at times but my midwife would tickle his head a little and it would bring his heart rate right back up.
Just a few contractions in and I was already exhausted but bless all that is good...pushing didn’t take long (especially considering the surprise we were about to have when the little man giant actually came out). It was only about 20 or so minutes into pushing when my nurse said “I bet he’s out in the next 2 pushes.” I thought she was just trying to be encouraging....because anyone that has ever had a baby knows that labor nurses are the bomb that way. Literal angels. But she was totally right. The very next push, his head was out. Then the rest of him followed. The cord was wrapped around his neck but my midwife was able to untangle him on his way out. His yummy round belly was the only part of him to get a little stuck. Just some extra pulling and maneuvering is all it took to get him hearthside at that point. Let’s just say I was prepared for allll the stitches to be necessary based on what it took to get that boy out.
Everyone in the room was shouting out about how big he was. “He’s definitely your biggest!” “At least 11 pounds!,” “I’d guess 11lb 2oz!." I didn’t believe any of them. I thought hey must be terrible at guessing weights...what a thing to be bad at when you literally see this every day. Ha! When 11lb 10oz was called out we were all shocked.
I was a little sad to have missed out on that immediate skin to skin in the minutes right after delivery, but I was also trembling and shaking all over (thank you delightful delivery hormones. Glamourrrrr). I was feeling a bit anxious about how the bleeding was going to go and to know what damage there was to repair after having 11-and-a-half pounds of baby pass through...but my team was way on top of everything. I was watched very closely and if my bleeding was anything short of total perfection, they were treating it...even if for another mom it would be considered within normal range. We wanted to take no chances. And it went beautifully. My bleeding was kept under control. I didn’t need a blood transfusion nor did I have to endure any of the other stress or pain that hemorrhage brings. Literal answered prayers.
.....AND.....
I didn’t tear.
Not a single stitch needed. An absolute birthing miracle straight from heaven. I have not had any tears after any of my previous deliveries either....but I’d always believed it was because I labored in the water, delivered unmedicated, and had freaking rad midwives that gave me all the right support in all the right places as I pushed. While I still had an awesome midwife that gave me all the right support this time, I chose an epidural this time so the other two things were not to be. I had accepted the fact that I was more likely to tear. I was ready for it. But alas, it was not so. “Yep.....You can birth anything” is what my midwife said after assessing me and my scrumptious gargantuan 11 and a half pound baby.
And that was how I became the woman that all the other women hate. Sorrrryyyy. Please don’t come at me.
So that is how Harvey made his earthside entrance (mostly smoothly) at 3:27 on 3/27. With a full head of wavy dark hair and the yummiest cheeks you’ve ever seen. The space age adhesive did eventually come off and I’m happy to report that my thigh muscle, soul, and the earth’s core are still in tact....though I couldn’t really say that for my poor skin. Ouch. It took exactly 24753268 alcohol wipes and at least an hour or two of pulling and some verbalized (and not verbalized) expletives to get the catheter clasp it to release its sticky grasp...but the under layer of adhesive still remained on my thigh for nearly 2 weeks...attracting any anything that came near it. I sported a nice 3 inch linty patch there for a good 2 weeks. Say it with me, now. Gla-mour.
Jokes aside...we are so thankful to have had such a smooth delivery experience this time and to have our sweet boy safely here with us earthside...that his size and his cord didn't cause any complications for him or I, and that we found an amazing provider that not only listened to our concerns, but took them seriously and cared for us in kind. Angels were definitely looking out for us every step of the way and we are feeling so very blessed.
Pregnancy and delivery may not be the most glamorous experience, but it certainly can be a magical one...filled with sacrifice, being brought to and beyond your physical, mental and emotional limits, and the tender, quiet moments that remind you of the miracle that all of it really is. It is truly a sacred and pure time that I cherish greatly and I am overwhelmed with gratitude to my Father in Heaven for the opportunities I've had to experience it.
